Febuary 2nd was my weigh-in day. It was also my boyfreinds birthday,and the day that I got a called for a job interview.
Weigh-in= gained .6 ounces...:(
Job interview= sucessful, I'm starting sometime this week! :D
Boyfreind= ?, because i told him i want to be just freinds now. I told him Happy Birthday, oh by the way, lets be buddies from now on, i still love you as a freind.
Because you see the thing is, we have 2 situations here.
1.) We are of two competely different religions, and my parents would never approve of us dating (or marriage, he's even thought that far, and this scared me!) and..
2.) I am too fat.
This is why I havent been posting. I dont know what to. I feel like a jerk face for having led him on, but at the same time why did we keep loving each other, when we knew we couldnt be together in the end?
I could cry, but I dont know what for. I told him the truth. He just doesnt get it. The world is a cruel place, that wont let us be together. Food is an evil thing, and it's always on my mind, (how to avoid it, get thinner thinner, etc..)
He just doesnt get it.
Whats so wrong with bieng just freinds?
Nothing, thats what...urrgghh, fuck him.. im gonna take some more laxatives, exercise, be hot and get rich from my new job, and he can just decide, it's freindship or nothing, because the only thing i love is me ="thin".