Saturday, March 27, 2010

Who do i tell?

Who else can i tell.. *please excuse my language...>.<

when i break my own promise's and eat the damned pizza..(only the toppings..but still...shame ;(
when i start to eat more and more and more. Telling myself with each new thing i reach for, that "this is the last thing, this is the last thing"
when the last thing becomes more like, might as well f- it. (mia's voice...she likes to visit every two weeks or so, right when I start to make any really progress...bitch. Her and me... )
when i got bits of food logded in my throught and nose, from purging...disgusting.
when i drink gallon or two of water to ward off the light headedness and dehdration.
when aftewards i get on the treadmill for about 80.00 mins?
when i still dont think thats gud enough, and want to pretend this day never happened
when im glad i saved the laxies for days like this.

I can only tell you guys.

***Lesson learned: Dont become over confident, weight is lost thru EATING LESS. Not making excuses (!) ***

I know I'll be okay. But had to get that off my chest. And if you actually read all that..well give urself a pat a on the back...lol

gud nite everyone..and hopefully a much better tomarow... :)
 

7 comments:

  1. this same thing happens to about every weekend lol. i get super happy with my weekly weight loss that i think i can handle eating out. big mistake. or i cook at home and tell myself" yeah im strong enough to only eat one portion". haha i love how i can lie to myself so easily. what matters though is that you are strong enough to get back up and start it all again tomorrow. and in a few days this pizza disaster will be but a distant nightmarish memory. :)
    stay strong
    meg

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  2. i did this exact thing yesterday.. pizza, cookies, a sandwich.. what the hell... xox

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  3. yea I've had those days. Based on the previous comments, everyone makes that mistake and no one learns from it. And then you feel so guilty that you have to work harder the next couple days. Oh well, just gives you more determination.

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  4. I know how frustrating it can be when inside your head you're screaming about the pizza you just ate but you can't tell anyone because they'll just tell you "shut up, its pizza".

    Thats why you are ALWAYS welcome here :)

    I have done the exact same thing. Brush yourself off, start over. You'll be okay.

    xoxo

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  5. Arrrggghhh! I know exactly how this feels! Stay strong hunny! I know you can do it!

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  6. For most of us, rewarding ourselves or thinking positively will only lead us quickly to failure.

    But don't stresss, you are doing fine. As long as the pizza doesn't lead to eating for days or something then like the other girls said, just dust yourself off and stay back on track


    xoxoxox

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  7. I feel exactly the same. I know what you're going through.
    Be strong.
    xx

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